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Two words for you all: CHRISTIAN. KANE.

As I’m sure most of you already know by now by my MASSIVE squeezing over it, me and Nicole took a road trip to Nashville, TN to see Mr. Kane perform. It took four hours to drive from Atlanta to Nashville.

We left on Monday, which was one hell of a day for me. Got woke up by my phone only to find a million emails all of which included getting my ass chewed out. Lots of drama, all because people like to take one tiny thing and make it into this big monster that has NOTHING to do with what it originally was. But most of this shit has been resolved, so whatever. I do have one more bone to pick, but I’ll get there. Sometimes, like now, my bite is way worse than my bite. Just an FYI for those that started this entire mess.

But anyway.

Yeah so Monday sucked. Not only did all that drama happen, but then my computer just wouldn’t fucking start for the life of me. Then, we were supposed to leave around two, but we shit just kept happening and we didn’t end up leaving until like six. But we did finally leave. The road trip was pretty fun, all except when we almost got killed by a truck. And that isn’t an exaggeration. Here we are, in her little fucking banana yellow jeep, and this damn truck didn’t put on his blinker and started coming over. Meanwhile, we’re trapped against the guardrail. We seriously only barely made it out. It was scary as hell.

So Monday night was still kind of a mess. Nicole’s friend had this friend we were supposed to be staying with. Well, we go and hang out with a bunch of her friends, which was really fun. I’m actually surprised I got along with all of them so well… you guys know how horrible I am with people usually. Anyway, turns out Nicole’s friend found this girl from this thing called Couch Crashers or something. She didn’t know her. What’s more, the girl thought we had somewhere to stay already.

We just ended up getting a hotel. Motel 6, to be exact. It’s funny, cause Nicole asked me if I knew any cheap hotels and I said that one, because that’s where I used to stay when I was all cracked out on meth. Brought back memories. Those damn hotels are full of drug addicts and dealers. It’s crazy. Made me slightly nostalgic, even though I know how fucked up that is.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss getting high. I still think about it all the time. It’s fucking horrible. Frankly, I have no idea how I’ve managed to stay clean this long.

So the next day we wake up and… the cameras dead. So what do we do? Go to fucking Wal-Mart, aka, the death sentence on my wallet. Oh I need a winter coat, oh I need new shoes, jewelry, oh and while I’m at it… doesn’t that scarf look cute? Seriously. You all have no idea.

But I look fabulous. Just in case anyone was wondering. And yes, I do think one can look fabulous while wearing Wal-Mart clothes.

Then we have time to kill. So what’s cool to do in Nashville (besides drinking)? THE SCIENCE MUSEUM! Me and Nicole kind of relived out childhood a little bit. Parents looked at us funny and steered their children away from the two crazy women who are playing with children’s tools for learning.

Which by the way, don’t try to climb a jungle gym contraption thing in heels. It doesn’t work out very well.

We found the concert place pretty easily. Did help that the Kaniacs were lined up out the door. Me and Nicole actually looked pretty out of place there. I won’t say why, but we did. It was a bit strange, mostly cause I hate when people just stare at me. I always think I have something on my face that just ain’t supposed to be there.

And now I have to brag that we got seats at the bar, right next to the stage. Because there? Yeah that’s my place to be. Alcohol and Kane? Gimme more, gimme more.

I was bouncy as hell, and downing more Long Islands than I probably should. Squeed over the picture they were handing out being taken by Beth too (which, hi, how hard is it to spell Riesgraf? I before E, people… we learn that in school. REIsgraf just looks weird.)

So right. Kane. He comes out on stage, in this whirlwind of sexy hot manliness (yeah, says the lesbian lol) and everyone starts screaming. I might have been included in that, but you’ll never know. So of course, MY first reaction, seriously, was “Oh my godddd… he’s fucking sexy as HELL!” it was said outloud, very loudly, in a tone of voice people should never hear me use unless their naked with me in bed lmao. Really, if I’m to be honest, it was like a damn moan.

Women? I like women? I can’t remember, Kane’s in front of me….

Rofl.

Really, for those of you that have not met him yet, his sexiness fucking EXPLODES in real life. He’s not half as hot on TV. Which now makes me worry that when I see Beth I might spontaneously orgasm or something if that same is true in her case lol.

Moving on.

He starts with “The House Rules” which of course makes everyone bounce around and scream. And he all grabbed his crotch and… oh… okay, focus. Right. Yeah anyway, he was AMAZING live. Honestly I was really surprised. I don’t go to concerts all that much only cause most of the time I do people are horrible live. But his voice is like HEAVEN.

Serenade me, please.
I looked around the crowd a couple of times and was surprised to see that me and only a few others were singing. I’ve come to the conclusion that half of the people who came that at least only came for stalker purposes, and probably haven’t heard much of Kane’s music. Not that I didn’t come for stalker purposes, aha, but I do love his music too.

He preformed “Different Kind of Knight”, one my favorite songs, and it made me swoon. I wish he played “Whiskey In Mind,” but after “Rattlesnake Smile” and “Let Me Go,” all is forgiven.

So during the concert, some woman comes up to me and is like “You’re hot.”

So of course I’m like “Er… thanks?” lol.

Anyway, she says her name is Heather, and she’s Christian’s business partner, and she does promotions and music videos and stuff and wanted my information. So I gave her my phone number, I got hers and well, I’ll guess we’ll see if anything comes out of it.

Oh, during the concert, right at the beginning, Nicole starts hitting my arm like a spaz. So I’m like “WHAT?!” and she’s like “DID YOU SEE THAT?!” And I was like “See what?” cause I’m all in the middle with trying to tweet a little video of the concert. And she’s like “HE LOOKED RIGHT AT YOU.”

So of course I’m like “Wait, seriously?” And she’s like “Yeah, do you think he knows who you are?” and I told her no, that I doubt he would know me by SIGHT. I don’t think Beth would even know me by sight if she saw me in a crowd of people.

But then he looked directly at me AGAIN. That time I caught it. Like it was entirely obvious that he was looking directly at me. It made things dance in places I’d rather not say lmao.

And then it happens one more time.

So Nicole’s like “If he doesn’t know who you are, he probably thinks you’re hot or something. He seriously keeps looking at you.”

Cue me dying.

Anyway, after the concert a bunch of us waited around for him to come out and mingle. And he did. But we were all in the way of everything, and I said we should probably just go in the other room, just throwing my two cents in, maybe just voicing my thoughts outloud. Didn’t expect anyone to listen. So it totally caught me off guard when he turned to me and asked, “You think the other room would be better?” Um, whatever dude, you totally just made my brain stop by addressing me directly in a crowd of a bunch of people and being like half a foot away from me. So I just nod. My mouth failed me lol. I got lost in his eyes.

Oh, my little hetero-crush. So cute.

So eventually we all get into the other room, and Chris is literally backed up against a bar. Trapped. He deals with it fairly well though. There is no order to our chaos, no line to speak of. We’re all just crowded around him. There’s two people in front of me, and a million next to me. You know the looking thing? Yeah he did it again. He was talking to two other girls in front of me and just looks up at me, catches his eyes with mine, and just fucking smiles.

I swear my heart jumped out of my damn chest. Jesus.

Anyway, so I didn’t have to wait too long. Even though there was a million people all around me, and I wasn’t even directly in front of him, HE turned to ME and said hi, and held out his hand for my picture for him to sign.

I died. Again. This is the theme of this entire entry, obviously.

Now, everyone keep in mind… I’m drunk. When I’m drunk, I flirt. Also, everyone tells me I do this thing with my tongue when I smile that just makes me look like a slut, but in a good way, apparently. I noticed I was doing it with him, and tried to stop myself, but it really didn’t work.

Now before this, Nicole was like “Are you going to tell him who you are?” And honestly, that just makes me feel like I’m conceited or something, or trying to boost my own importance. It makes me feel awkward. But that was when I was sober. DRUNK Mary on the other hand felt the need for him to know exactly who I am, because I wanna feel the love lol.

So I start rambling all, “So I don’t know if you know who I am, I know a lot of people do on the show, but I…” then Nicole interrupts, and he’s laughing and smiles at me and says, “Just tell me.” And I said “Well I’m the girl that does that Leverage/Parker YouTube channel.” And he just LOOKS at me, like he’s finally putting something together, or he’s trying to remember something, or hell, I don’t know. But he looked at me in this way I can’t really describe, but it was a good way. Then he smirked and said, “Yeah I know who you are, mostly because Beth always talks about you.”

Me inside: OMG, BETH TALKS ABOUT ME?! SQUEE! OMG OMG OMG
Me outside: “Seriously?”

Anyway, he signs my picture with my name and everything, and then he gave me a hug and said “Thanks for all that you do for the show, man. We really appreciate it.”

Cue me dancing inside.

So then there was an interaction after that which I will NOT talk about, mainly because I don’t think he was supposed to answer my question, er, EXACTLY in the way that he did. Especially not with a million other people around. So just, for future reference, if that ever DOES get out, it’s not my fault. I really wish I woudn’t be blamed for everything.

Anyway, I left, and totally forgot to kiss him for my friend, forgot to tell him I’d go straight for him )yes those were things on my to do list). But I was overwhelmed, can you blame me? Next time maybe I won’t be so… OMGYOUR THESEXMYBRAINHASDIEDJUSTFUCKING…LOOKATMEWITHYOURPRETTYEYESPLZ.

Yes, that was my train of thought lol.

Oh yeah, afterwards, Nicole told me there was this crazy fan behind me that kept hating on me hard core. Like looking all jealous when he turned to me, and she’s all glaring, and Nicole said she swear she heard the girl growl.

SCARY! Lol

Anyway, I know I’m probably missing a bunch of shit but this is getting really long and I need to go the store to get cigarettes.

But in conclusion?

I want to fuck that man. Hardcore. With neck biting and hair pulling. Then after he can sing to me and all is right in the world. lol

Yeah, the end.

Labels: christian kane, concert, leverage

Two words for you all: CHRISTIAN. KANE.

As I’m sure most of you already know by now by my MASSIVE squeezing over it, me and Nicole took a road trip to Nashville, TN to see Mr. Kane perform. It took four hours to drive from Atlanta to Nashville.

We left on Monday, which was one hell of a day for me. Got woke up by my phone only to find a million emails all of which included getting my ass chewed out. Lots of drama, all because people like to take one tiny thing and make it into this big monster that has NOTHING to do with what it originally was. But most of this shit has been resolved, so whatever. I do have one more bone to pick, but I’ll get there. Sometimes, like now, my bite is way worse than my bite. Just an FYI for those that started this entire mess.

But anyway.

Yeah so Monday sucked. Not only did all that drama happen, but then my computer just wouldn’t fucking start for the life of me. Then, we were supposed to leave around two, but we shit just kept happening and we didn’t end up leaving until like six. But we did finally leave. The road trip was pretty fun, all except when we almost got killed by a truck. And that isn’t an exaggeration. Here we are, in her little fucking banana yellow jeep, and this damn truck didn’t put on his blinker and started coming over. Meanwhile, we’re trapped against the guardrail. We seriously only barely made it out. It was scary as hell.

So Monday night was still kind of a mess. Nicole’s friend had this friend we were supposed to be staying with. Well, we go and hang out with a bunch of her friends, which was really fun. I’m actually surprised I got along with all of them so well… you guys know how horrible I am with people usually. Anyway, turns out Nicole’s friend found this girl from this thing called Couch Crashers or something. She didn’t know her. What’s more, the girl thought we had somewhere to stay already.

We just ended up getting a hotel. Motel 6, to be exact. It’s funny, cause Nicole asked me if I knew any cheap hotels and I said that one, because that’s where I used to stay when I was all cracked out on meth. Brought back memories. Those damn hotels are full of drug addicts and dealers. It’s crazy. Made me slightly nostalgic, even though I know how fucked up that is.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss getting high. I still think about it all the time. It’s fucking horrible. Frankly, I have no idea how I’ve managed to stay clean this long.

So the next day we wake up and… the cameras dead. So what do we do? Go to fucking Wal-Mart, aka, the death sentence on my wallet. Oh I need a winter coat, oh I need new shoes, jewelry, oh and while I’m at it… doesn’t that scarf look cute? Seriously. You all have no idea.

But I look fabulous. Just in case anyone was wondering. And yes, I do think one can look fabulous while wearing Wal-Mart clothes.

Then we have time to kill. So what’s cool to do in Nashville (besides drinking)? THE SCIENCE MUSEUM! Me and Nicole kind of relived out childhood a little bit. Parents looked at us funny and steered their children away from the two crazy women who are playing with children’s tools for learning.

Which by the way, don’t try to climb a jungle gym contraption thing in heels. It doesn’t work out very well.

We found the concert place pretty easily. Did help that the Kaniacs were lined up out the door. Me and Nicole actually looked pretty out of place there. I won’t say why, but we did. It was a bit strange, mostly cause I hate when people just stare at me. I always think I have something on my face that just ain’t supposed to be there.

And now I have to brag that we got seats at the bar, right next to the stage. Because there? Yeah that’s my place to be. Alcohol and Kane? Gimme more, gimme more.

I was bouncy as hell, and downing more Long Islands than I probably should. Squeed over the picture they were handing out being taken by Beth too (which, hi, how hard is it to spell Riesgraf? I before E, people… we learn that in school. REIsgraf just looks weird.)

So right. Kane. He comes out on stage, in this whirlwind of sexy hot manliness (yeah, says the lesbian lol) and everyone starts screaming. I might have been included in that, but you’ll never know. So of course, MY first reaction, seriously, was “Oh my godddd… he’s fucking sexy as HELL!” it was said outloud, very loudly, in a tone of voice people should never hear me use unless their naked with me in bed lmao. Really, if I’m to be honest, it was like a damn moan.

Women? I like women? I can’t remember, Kane’s in front of me….

Rofl.

Really, for those of you that have not met him yet, his sexiness fucking EXPLODES in real life. He’s not half as hot on TV. Which now makes me worry that when I see Beth I might spontaneously orgasm or something if that same is true in her case lol.

Moving on.

He starts with “The House Rules” which of course makes everyone bounce around and scream. And he all grabbed his crotch and… oh… okay, focus. Right. Yeah anyway, he was AMAZING live. Honestly I was really surprised. I don’t go to concerts all that much only cause most of the time I do people are horrible live. But his voice is like HEAVEN.

Serenade me, please.
I looked around the crowd a couple of times and was surprised to see that me and only a few others were singing. I’ve come to the conclusion that half of the people who came that at least only came for stalker purposes, and probably haven’t heard much of Kane’s music. Not that I didn’t come for stalker purposes, aha, but I do love his music too.

He preformed “Different Kind of Knight”, one my favorite songs, and it made me swoon. I wish he played “Whiskey In Mind,” but after “Rattlesnake Smile” and “Let Me Go,” all is forgiven.

So during the concert, some woman comes up to me and is like “You’re hot.”

So of course I’m like “Er… thanks?” lol.

Anyway, she says her name is Heather, and she’s Christian’s business partner, and she does promotions and music videos and stuff and wanted my information. So I gave her my phone number, I got hers and well, I’ll guess we’ll see if anything comes out of it.

Oh, during the concert, right at the beginning, Nicole starts hitting my arm like a spaz. So I’m like “WHAT?!” and she’s like “DID YOU SEE THAT?!” And I was like “See what?” cause I’m all in the middle with trying to tweet a little video of the concert. And she’s like “HE LOOKED RIGHT AT YOU.”

So of course I’m like “Wait, seriously?” And she’s like “Yeah, do you think he knows who you are?” and I told her no, that I doubt he would know me by SIGHT. I don’t think Beth would even know me by sight if she saw me in a crowd of people.

But then he looked directly at me AGAIN. That time I caught it. Like it was entirely obvious that he was looking directly at me. It made things dance in places I’d rather not say lmao.

And then it happens one more time.

So Nicole’s like “If he doesn’t know who you are, he probably thinks you’re hot or something. He seriously keeps looking at you.”

Cue me dying.

Anyway, after the concert a bunch of us waited around for him to come out and mingle. And he did. But we were all in the way of everything, and I said we should probably just go in the other room, just throwing my two cents in, maybe just voicing my thoughts outloud. Didn’t expect anyone to listen. So it totally caught me off guard when he turned to me and asked, “You think the other room would be better?” Um, whatever dude, you totally just made my brain stop by addressing me directly in a crowd of a bunch of people and being like half a foot away from me. So I just nod. My mouth failed me lol. I got lost in his eyes.

Oh, my little hetero-crush. So cute.

So eventually we all get into the other room, and Chris is literally backed up against a bar. Trapped. He deals with it fairly well though. There is no order to our chaos, no line to speak of. We’re all just crowded around him. There’s two people in front of me, and a million next to me. You know the looking thing? Yeah he did it again. He was talking to two other girls in front of me and just looks up at me, catches his eyes with mine, and just fucking smiles.

I swear my heart jumped out of my damn chest. Jesus.

Anyway, so I didn’t have to wait too long. Even though there was a million people all around me, and I wasn’t even directly in front of him, HE turned to ME and said hi, and held out his hand for my picture for him to sign.

I died. Again. This is the theme of this entire entry, obviously.

Now, everyone keep in mind… I’m drunk. When I’m drunk, I flirt. Also, everyone tells me I do this thing with my tongue when I smile that just makes me look like a slut, but in a good way, apparently. I noticed I was doing it with him, and tried to stop myself, but it really didn’t work.

Now before this, Nicole was like “Are you going to tell him who you are?” And honestly, that just makes me feel like I’m conceited or something, or trying to boost my own importance. It makes me feel awkward. But that was when I was sober. DRUNK Mary on the other hand felt the need for him to know exactly who I am, because I wanna feel the love lol.

So I start rambling all, “So I don’t know if you know who I am, I know a lot of people do on the show, but I…” then Nicole interrupts, and he’s laughing and smiles at me and says, “Just tell me.” And I said “Well I’m the girl that does that Leverage/Parker YouTube channel.” And he just LOOKS at me, like he’s finally putting something together, or he’s trying to remember something, or hell, I don’t know. But he looked at me in this way I can’t really describe, but it was a good way. Then he smirked and said, “Yeah I know who you are, mostly because Beth always talks about you.”

Me inside: OMG, BETH TALKS ABOUT ME?! SQUEE! OMG OMG OMG
Me outside: “Seriously?”

Anyway, he signs my picture with my name and everything, and then he gave me a hug and said “Thanks for all that you do for the show, man. We really appreciate it.”

Cue me dancing inside.

So then there was an interaction after that which I will NOT talk about, mainly because I don’t think he was supposed to answer my question, er, EXACTLY in the way that he did. Especially not with a million other people around. So just, for future reference, if that ever DOES get out, it’s not my fault. I really wish I woudn’t be blamed for everything.

Anyway, I left, and totally forgot to kiss him for my friend, forgot to tell him I’d go straight for him )yes those were things on my to do list). But I was overwhelmed, can you blame me? Next time maybe I won’t be so… OMGYOUR THESEXMYBRAINHASDIEDJUSTFUCKING…LOOKATMEWITHYOURPRETTYEYESPLZ.

Yes, that was my train of thought lol.

Oh yeah, afterwards, Nicole told me there was this crazy fan behind me that kept hating on me hard core. Like looking all jealous when he turned to me, and she’s all glaring, and Nicole said she swear she heard the girl growl.

SCARY! Lol

Anyway, I know I’m probably missing a bunch of shit but this is getting really long and I need to go the store to get cigarettes.

But in conclusion?

I want to fuck that man. Hardcore. With neck biting and hair pulling. Then after he can sing to me and all is right in the world. lol

Yeah, the end.

Labels: christian kane, concert, leverage

My name is Mary. I'm a 24 year old creative mess. I like to tell stories in anyway that I can, though mostly through visual artwork. I enjoy film editing, writing, modeling, photography, dancing, and website design. I'm a lesbian. I'm bipolar. I'm stronger than I usually give myself credit for. I'm a recovering drug addict. I'm passionate as all hell. I'm a beautiful disaster. I want to be free. I want to fly.

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